It happened again yesterday during an appointment with my son's new cardiologist. We were going over results and discussing care plans and she paused, looking at me almost surprised, "you ask really good questions."
I started to apologize but took it back, "I'm a doula so I like to ask a lot of questions and know all of our care options." That's when she sighed and said one of the saddest phrases I often hear, "I could have really used a doula." She had just come back from maternity leave.
For some reason hearing it this time left me feeling particularly disheartened - why are so many women and families going through birth and early postpartum without support? Why are they looking back and wishing they had done it differently? I mean, the studies are in and all point to the need for the role of the doula in birth and postpartum. Families without a doula miss out on continuous, undivided, whole-person focused attention and care that the medical system alone cannot provide.
There is almost no greater life changing experience than birthing and bringing home a child. The physical and emotional demands, the learning curve, and the healing process - these require support. They are too much to do alone, or even with a supportive partner. You both deserve to be cared for and nurtured as you enter a profound time of caring for and nurturing your new baby.
Having the help you need helps you have a better experience and makes you feel more confident during one of the biggest adventures of your life.
Don't look back and wish you had had a doula. Your story is too important for it to have regret and heartache.
I started to apologize but took it back, "I'm a doula so I like to ask a lot of questions and know all of our care options." That's when she sighed and said one of the saddest phrases I often hear, "I could have really used a doula." She had just come back from maternity leave.
For some reason hearing it this time left me feeling particularly disheartened - why are so many women and families going through birth and early postpartum without support? Why are they looking back and wishing they had done it differently? I mean, the studies are in and all point to the need for the role of the doula in birth and postpartum. Families without a doula miss out on continuous, undivided, whole-person focused attention and care that the medical system alone cannot provide.
There is almost no greater life changing experience than birthing and bringing home a child. The physical and emotional demands, the learning curve, and the healing process - these require support. They are too much to do alone, or even with a supportive partner. You both deserve to be cared for and nurtured as you enter a profound time of caring for and nurturing your new baby.
Having the help you need helps you have a better experience and makes you feel more confident during one of the biggest adventures of your life.
Don't look back and wish you had had a doula. Your story is too important for it to have regret and heartache.